I am A Mirror, Reflection Is My pourpose
Well, My evening has been Interesting to say the least, I have managed to come up with enuf change from my suit case and back pack to do a load of laundry and to get an ice tea, in between that I managed to fold the laundry pick up phillips bedroom, at least my things, he is a tidy guy so not much to pick up, and I also managed to pick up the kitchen again not much to pick up and I also went in the bathroom and kinda picked up in there.....Not much of a mess anyplace, lol the one time I feel Like cleaning, I think I feel like cleaning cause Its a way for me NOT to be left alone with myself, So turn up the music and Drown my thoughts. I have managed to dig myself a nice lil hole of debt, as far as my credit and my credit union are concernd, I guess when my boss went to deposit my check I failed to give him the routing numbers that he needed, instead I gave him my account number, which is what I was told to give in the beggining, what is sad is that I don't think I can do anything but pay the $$1062$$ That I owe, and From now on just make shure that I am more careful about trip planning, when it comes to timming and payroll.
as far as my trip ios concernd, I have made up my mind that I am going to tell phillip exactly how I feel, what makes this time diffrent is I don't worry about him, what I mean by that is , I don't worry what he is doing, or anything like that that, I may worry about him if he is late being someplace or some thing like that, a normal cause for worry, but I don't get freaked out if I don't have him in my sight and I enjoy my time on my own, but I also value the time i have with him.
I have also run into a few lost freinds from the past that I had, back when i was like 16, lol we all where in the same group, and we where all friends with my first bf/ actuall man that I have loved, out of like 2 or three totall. anyway they are all doing well. .......
OK so Now it is Sunday night, I am leaving Tommorow and well, I guess it is time to sum up my trip, so here it goes.
I found someone I could love, I found A spark, I also managed to find some new freinds, and I managed to loose a few that I really didn't need in my life, Jordan Pink being the one I lost.....Yeah I know what your thinking, I have spoken so highly of her in the past....well, I have done drugs, I admit it openly, but it is one thing to do them, it is another thing to go around keeping it a secrect from people in such a conspicuious manor that everyone knows what you are up to that you not only look stupid but its practicly entertaining to watch you go around trying to get ur shit of choice!! besides that Hypocracy isn't something I want in my life, Next time I hear someone that uses drugs, lecture me about using drugs..not that I use them ANYMORE, but just lecture me like that in general I am going to turn to them and tell them to get away from me because they are draining all the o2 that I am planning on using for a good cause, where as they are waisting it. lol
I also Talked to the Show coordonater at the escape club in portland, I told him to start booking me shows a couple months in advance, things sound promising and if i get to be good enuf who knows what I can accomplish!!
I must say that the weather here is rather humid, mopre so then I would like, as it is I don't handle heat well, it makes me cranky, irritable, and most of all clingy when it comes to wanting to be held, it never fails, just ask phillip, lopl we would go to bed and hahaha i had him clear over on the edge of the bed a few times cause I wanted to cuddle and he didn't or something like that, I was asleep for that so I don't know the exact details, but All in all this entire trip has been on of a life time and I wouldn't trade it for anythingPhillip and I also VERBALIZED, what was going on with him and I I think It was two days ago now, I had to have it spelt out for me cause you readers know how I can get, Ill smother someone if I don't know what is going on. and as far as Him and I are concernd...It wqould work out, if i was closer, and who knows in 2-6 months I may be living up here, not just for the fun of it but because I love this place way to much to keep on thinking of moving and not doing anything about it, and I am tierd of making friends and always having to say goodbye, lol I sometimes wish we all lived in the same area because it would be so much simpler but at the same time thats what makes trips so much fun lol...well my dears it is time for me to go and pack to go back home I ilove you all
Chaio Bello~Rob-b
as far as my trip ios concernd, I have made up my mind that I am going to tell phillip exactly how I feel, what makes this time diffrent is I don't worry about him, what I mean by that is , I don't worry what he is doing, or anything like that that, I may worry about him if he is late being someplace or some thing like that, a normal cause for worry, but I don't get freaked out if I don't have him in my sight and I enjoy my time on my own, but I also value the time i have with him.
I have also run into a few lost freinds from the past that I had, back when i was like 16, lol we all where in the same group, and we where all friends with my first bf/ actuall man that I have loved, out of like 2 or three totall. anyway they are all doing well. .......
OK so Now it is Sunday night, I am leaving Tommorow and well, I guess it is time to sum up my trip, so here it goes.
I found someone I could love, I found A spark, I also managed to find some new freinds, and I managed to loose a few that I really didn't need in my life, Jordan Pink being the one I lost.....Yeah I know what your thinking, I have spoken so highly of her in the past....well, I have done drugs, I admit it openly, but it is one thing to do them, it is another thing to go around keeping it a secrect from people in such a conspicuious manor that everyone knows what you are up to that you not only look stupid but its practicly entertaining to watch you go around trying to get ur shit of choice!! besides that Hypocracy isn't something I want in my life, Next time I hear someone that uses drugs, lecture me about using drugs..not that I use them ANYMORE, but just lecture me like that in general I am going to turn to them and tell them to get away from me because they are draining all the o2 that I am planning on using for a good cause, where as they are waisting it. lol
I also Talked to the Show coordonater at the escape club in portland, I told him to start booking me shows a couple months in advance, things sound promising and if i get to be good enuf who knows what I can accomplish!!
I must say that the weather here is rather humid, mopre so then I would like, as it is I don't handle heat well, it makes me cranky, irritable, and most of all clingy when it comes to wanting to be held, it never fails, just ask phillip, lopl we would go to bed and hahaha i had him clear over on the edge of the bed a few times cause I wanted to cuddle and he didn't or something like that, I was asleep for that so I don't know the exact details, but All in all this entire trip has been on of a life time and I wouldn't trade it for anythingPhillip and I also VERBALIZED, what was going on with him and I I think It was two days ago now, I had to have it spelt out for me cause you readers know how I can get, Ill smother someone if I don't know what is going on. and as far as Him and I are concernd...It wqould work out, if i was closer, and who knows in 2-6 months I may be living up here, not just for the fun of it but because I love this place way to much to keep on thinking of moving and not doing anything about it, and I am tierd of making friends and always having to say goodbye, lol I sometimes wish we all lived in the same area because it would be so much simpler but at the same time thats what makes trips so much fun lol...well my dears it is time for me to go and pack to go back home I ilove you all
Chaio Bello~Rob-b
posted by Rob-b at 12:39 AM
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