EVERYTHING EVERYTHING

i miss you more in a thousand ways how did it change so fast i won't give you to the past i thought it would last, what we has was unbelavable, still in my dreams your so damm beautiful how could you be my everything everything. it seems like everywhere everyones in love so where are you. i remember you couldn't get enuf. I WON"T GIVE YOU TO THE PAST. COME BACK FROM THE PAST I SUMMON THE I SUMMON THE DUST URSELF OFF AND COME BACK TO ME.
what a great song from M2M.
its called everything
Well i was talking to an ex of mine, and the funny thing is; get this. he was fresh out of the clostet and when i mean fresh out the closet ladies and germs, i mean he had cedar chips hanging in his hair. anyway we spent 3 days together, and it took me a long time to get those 3 days I EARND THOSE 3 DAYS!!!
but moving on, this is one of those relationships i wanted to do right, so no sex, just snuggles and like umm a lil wrestleing. and not going to far on my part. well check this out last night after a year of not knowing why he didn't want to pursue anything, well comes to find out he thought he was in lust and because i wasn't putting out he got mad and i mean i am giving the short version i am just giving you the jist of it all. but funny enuf he said he could have pushed it if he wanted to and he didn't so that means he had enuf respect for me not to thus making my night last night lol...not very often that you make a friend and drag them out from the sands of time cause you think you fucked up majorly, i really don't put anyone at fault in my head i followed my heart and advice i don't regret it i have benifited knowing i have self controll cause belive me i wanted to jump his bones i did i wanted to make him walk funny it was so hard not to but yeah he is my friend now and i am happy with that who knows maybe we can move it along a lil bit more with time and trust . anyway i am outie ttyl

who's to say, were not good enuf

shine so bright when youare around to tell us slow down, we are to yung you need to slow down speed is the key, they don't know who we are, who is to say we arn't good enuf, who is to say that this is not our love. mother don't, tell me friends are the ones that i loose, cause theyd bleed before you. sometimes family are the ones you choose its too late now i hold on to this life i have found and who is to say that we won't burn it out and who is to say that we won't sink it down and who is to say that way we won't fade to grey who are they anyway anyway they don't know.
and you say we are to young but maybe you are to old to remember, and i try to pretend but i feel it when we are together. and if you don't remember then you really never knew us.~ VENESSA CARLTON
I wish that I could burn In flames at times.
I know that sounds horrible and gorry, but, I would wish to rise out of my ashes and fly again as something new but phyiscly the same thing, I new chance, even though everyday we get a chance to do things diffrent everytime we step out from the sheets that we sleep in at night.
Love is dancing on my finger, he got to the heart of the matter., haha another song by sweet vannsessa, it is called SAN FRANSISCO.
but yeah I mean, people say shit left and right, and society leavs these people unpunished, because to get even or give them a dose of there own medicene is not right and then on top of that to even shun them is bad as well WHAT IS UP WITH THAT MOTTLY CHREW BULLSHIT!!
I am going back to my parents house, so i can earn moola to go up to portland, well spending moola and part of my ticket if i can, my parents are weird about money when it comes to me and going places. OH well. anyway tell me my lovely's what are you doing, as i twiddle my thumbs and give you all that are reading and evil grin ,lol.
lord boise state university is dead today but i think that might be because it is MLD.
anyway with that said i am going to let all of you go a spechial hello and huggs and kiss's go out to David, my good friend andrew, MIZZ PINK. and to the nice bois who fuckd with me for the last time, pay back is a bitch isn't it

mirror mirror, you don't have to tell me whos the biggest fool of alll

yeah well Robbie offically has one more flake to add to the list of flakes and assholes to the list he has going!!
but yeah, its all good what have I been doing, well i have been living back at home with my parents, i just got tierd of all the BS and the drama of bois, no one understanding or givng me a break cause i don't want to do something or be somplace. so i just went home. its a nice solution i think.
so what have yall been up to this past few weeks?
nothing?
ok let me tell you about what i have been doing
i have been saving up moola to go to pdx, and it sucks cause i had a chance to revert and take a free ticket up there, and instead of ignoring my intuition i followd it and blew the guy off cause there was just something about it. my friend bill had to clue me in to follow my head instead of my heart and that was idfficult, and I have another friend up there that i want to see and I hope he was bummed when i told him i wasn't comming up, cause I like him and if he dont get bummd that means that well that i need to work harder that for me right now at this distance..lets just say that if i strecd that much the chiropractor would be mad, I also have a new booking agent All the talents got together and fierd the booking agent we had, cause she was stealing from us, and it wasn't money it was time and resourse. she didn't even put forth any effort to get us auditions.
so yeah we hierd a new one and i am happy with her. I made the mistake of cancelling my apt with her for an audition but ill get the moola back later.
anyway i am going to go for now ok SMOOCH

HAPPY NEW YEAR

well happy new year i will write more when i have the time i just wanted everyone to know that i havn't forgoted about them